Poetry

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Rewind

written by: Ti.anna

If someday it will all be okay , just like you say
and our spells of cold emotions all go away
will you look through me with that soul piercing gaze
Or would you look past me in a wandering haze?

If we meet again, in a couple of years
When this is all done, the grime and the tears
would you smile, hug me ,shake my hand
Or would you just ignore and leave me to withstand?

If we could turn back time, rewind and erase,
to introspect and change our ways,
would you reveal everything that was hidden
Or would you still think honesty was forbidden?

If we could watch our lives as a movie,
Would you remember every scene like i do?
would you cry with me , laugh, and play it all over?
or would you just leave it at the back of your closet pretending it never was?

If you saw me tomorrow, across the street
and my eyes still held the heat
of everything said and done,
of all i dreamt was mine,which in fact hadnt even begun.

If you saw me tomorrow, still wondering why
would you be able to look me in the eye
and tell me that everything you said wasnt a lie?
If you saw me tomorrow......you wouldnt even know
because what i feel, is not something i'd show
You let me fall so hard and deep
but im up again... still wondering, still loving and your secrets are mine to keep..:)





Comments:

Tue, Sep 16, 2008 at 5:39AM

Well done. The third stanza has to be my favorite. It flows very nicely, and is a pleasant read. The fourth stanza seems out of place. It breaks up the rythym. But overall a good piece!

Wed, Sep 17, 2008 at 3:35PM

thank you! yea the fourth does break the rhythm but it was intended:)

Thu, Sep 18, 2008 at 9:37AM

Haha, it is always hard to tell whether a break from the pattern inside of a poem is intentional or not. I guess most of the time it doesnt matter whether it's intended or not. As long as it creates something, right?

Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 8:54AM

yea it shudnt matter while writing ..cos it comes naturally...but techincally sometimes it matters cos of whos goin to read it..like u did:) u noticed the break and it matters that u told me...rite? so thank you hehe

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