Poetry

Talking Osama Paranoid Blues

written by: UsKidsKnow

(Based On "Talkin' John Birch Paranoid Blues" by Bob Dylan)



Well, I was feelin' sad and Kinda blue
I didnt know what I was a-gonna do
Them Terrorists was a-comin' around
They was in the air
They was on the ground,
They was all over...

So I run down most hurridly
and joined the anti-terrorist society
Got me a secret membership card
and went back home to the yard
Started lookin' on the the sidewalk,
Under the hedges...

Well I got up in the mornin' 'n' looked under the sink
I was lookin' everywhere I could think
Looked under the bed, and under the floor
Looked in my car, and behind the door
Couldnt find any...

Looked behind the clothes, behind the chair
Lookin' for them terrorists everywhere
Looked up my chimney hole
Even deep down inside my toilet bowl,
They got away...

I heard some footsteps by the front porch door
So I grabbed my shot-gun from the floor
Snuck around the house with a huff and a hist
Saying "Hands up, you terrorist!"
It was the mailman,
He punched me out...

Well, I was sitting at home an' started to sweat
Figured they was in my TV Set
I peeked behind the picture frame
and got a shock from my feet to my brain
Them terrorists did it!
Charlie Sheen and that brother of his...

Well, I quite my job so I could work at home
got a magnifying glass like Sherlock Holmes
Followed some clues from my detective bag
And discovered Islamic Stars on the American Flag,
Did you know about Betty Ross...

Now, Obama, he's a terrorist spy
Lincoln, Jefferson, and that Roosevelt guy
To my knowledge there's just one man
Thats really a true American
Thats George W. Bush
I know he hates them Terrorist cus'
He started the Iraqi Wars...

Well, I finally started thinking staight
When I run outa things to investigate
Couldnt imagine nothing else
So now I'm home investigating myself
Hope I dont find out too much,
Good God!