Prose

she has to know (sarah)

written by: babeestars

"Why did you tell her!? I told you not to, I said not to!"
"I didn't tell her," I whispered, I fiddled with the silver ring on my finger, one of the many mannerisms I'd picked up from Katie. I looked up. And to my surprise her features softened.
"I know why you did it." Her eyes were filled with tears, "because it's what she would have done, and you're the same, she was right when she told me that all those times, Sarah, you are the same."
"I'm sorry... I ... I just couldn't lose her, not now."
"I know, but she still doesn't know, and I know what happened, and I guess we're going to have to tell her, she's really suspicious now."
"Can... Can I talk to her, can.. Can I tell her?" she considered her options, and selfishly she agreed, I guess she didn't want to go through the upset of telling Katie herself. But I was glad, because it meant I got to do things my way.
She insisted on driving me back to home, but it wasn't really my home, just the place where my biological family lived. I wanted to walk but she wouldn't let me. She opened the door letting my go into Katie's room alone. She turned her back to me. "What are you doing here?" she asked coldly. "What happened to never again?"
"You broke that when you followed me home that night and left me lying in a road."
"I'm sorry," guilt poisoned her voice, she put her head in her hands, "I'm so sorry," I could see her shoulders shaking as she cried. She turned to look at me. "Why do you do it Sarah, why do you make me feel this way?"
"remember when you were seven years old? And your mum had a baby? That baby was given away."
"Sarah stop playing games with me,"
"remember how you felt? But you promised yourself that you'd never give up hope of seeing her again? You loved her even if you didn't know her."
"Sarah, stop it why are you doing this?"
"That's what little sisters are for, right? To play mind games with you? Sometimes they make you feel like shit, other times you feel on top of the world, like you could spin and never stop." Confusion filled her eyes and spread across her features.
"Sarah, you know how much that hurt me, you know I could never forget what my mum did, I can't see how you could be so cold as to stand there and taunt me!"
"But can't you see Katie, I'm not taunting you, I'm your little sister."
"You're just saying it to stop me saying goodbye, Sarah your sick! How could you say something like that when it means so much to me to find my sister!"
"If you're so intent on finding her sister then why are you turning it away when she's staring you in the face?" I screamed back.
"Because...because..." her legs gave way like I was so used to mine doing, she sat shaking on the floor. "Stop this"
"I'm not doing anything."
"Mum," she sobbed, "mum!" and at that in came her mum, my mum, our mum.
"Is it true?" Katie murmured. She nodded.
"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you."
"how long have you known?"
"About two years."
"What?!" she shrieked "you both knew?!"
"No" I participated, "I've only known a couple of months."
"Get out." I pushed my way to the door but her mum insisted on staying.
"Katie,"
"GET OUT!"