Prose

forgive me

written by: babeestars

"No Chloe, I don't wanna go out. I don't feel like it, please."
"Come on!" she thrust my coat into my arms. My bag in her hand. "Lauren!"
"Chloe!"
"Oh come on, what harm will it do! You're all dressed up, with no one to see." I moaned as she dragged me to my feet. My hands fumbled round my coat until they reached the sleeves. "It'll be fun!"
"hmm." Since the break up I seemed convinced that fun no longer existed. Although he is a low life, I wanted him back. I wanted to feel his hands running through my hair as we kissed; or his breathe on my neck as he told me a secret; or his eyes staring back at mine dreamily.
The walk was cold. Chloe talked the whole way there. I wasn't really listening. I had other things on my mind. "... And so apparently John tried to sneak alcohol into the party and got completely busted by... Lauren? Are you listening?"
"Hmm."
He was the first person I saw as I walked in. The bass rattled through the floor, vibrating round the room. People sat at the bar, chatting laughing; men buying drinks for girls they never have a chance with. The dance floor was crammed with people. One over excited guy was making himself look like a fool, but at least, he was having fun. "Chloe this is a bad idea." Her eyes looked from me to Sam then back again.
"I am not letting him spoil our night."
"Chloe please."
"Just ignore him."
We bought drinks. Danced for a while. But I couldn't forget he was there. I would catch him watching me. He was with a group of friends, people I knew, people who used to be my friends until...
"do you mind if I just go to the loo? You'll be alright for a minute?" I nodded and positioned myself at the bar, well away from him.
"I told you so."
"Fuck off Ben."
"I was right though, I said it would never last."
"I said Fuck off."
"Do you want a drink?" I looked at him, about to repeat myself again. He smiled at me, and I knew I didn't want to be alone.
"Ok."
For a while it wasn't too bad. He explained why they were there. He told me he had given up drinking, so tonight he was completely sober. We even danced together.
"Ben? Can I ask you something?"
"Shoot."
"Doesn't matter."
"I'm back!"
"Chloe this is..." I turned round to introduce my best friend to the man who had told me it would all go wrong. But he wasn't there, wandered off into the night and mass of drunken bodies. She looked at me expectantly. "No one."
We found a quite table in the corner. It was poorly lit and littered with empty bottles and glasses. We would talk about nonsense and sing to our favourite songs. Every so often making a trip to the bar, or the toilets.
"Lauren." I had been dreading the moment but I knew it would come.
"Please, not now. Not tonight." I didn't turn to look at him, I didn't need to.
"Lauren," I knew I couldn't avoid him forever.
"Sam." I finally twisted to face him.
"Its Ben, he's collapsed outside." My eyes widened. Grabbing my bag from the seat beside me I could see Chloe doing the same.
"Where is he?" Sam led us to him. Immediately me and Chloe kicked into routine. He crewed together sometimes.
"I think he's drunk too much." Sam said, standing behind me, I could feel him watching.
"Something's not right, Chloe?" she wasn't beside me. Ben hadn't been drinking. Turning, my eyes fixed on him. "Don't you dare!" his left hand covered her mouth, pulling her back towards him. His right hand gripped a knife pressed to her neck. "Let her go Sam."
"We were so good together."
"Sam if you hurt her, I swear..."
"What! What are you going to do."
"Let her go!"
"Why did you leave Lauren?"
"You know why. Stop this." Coughing came from behind me. I changed. One minute I was trying to protect my best friend's life, the next to trying to safe another innocent person.
"He's fitting. Sam what have you given him?"
"I already said he's had too much to drink."
"So he just conveniently collapsed outside so you could pull out a knife on Chloe?" there was no reply. "Sam he wasn't drinking tonight. I spoke to him earlier at the bar." I pulled him onto his side instinctively. I turned back to the man, who last week, had been my lover. "Sam, why are you doing this? What do you want?"
"I want you."
"Then let Chloe go." I moved closer to him. "Let her go Sam. What good is she to you?"
"You always did care more about your friends than yourself."
"I care about you to Sam. That hasn't changed."
"We can go back to how it used to be." I could see his grip loosening. I nodded.
"Let her go Sam, it can just be me and you again." He lowered his left hand. Chloe gasped, inhaling deeply. "Put down the knife Sam." I took another cautious step closer, lifting my hand to his. His hold on the blade tightened, pressing it slightly closer to her pale skin. "Sam," my hand brushed his. Chloe's eyes were fixed on me. "Sam, give me the knife."
"that's all you want isn't it! You want me to let her go then you'll take it all back!" his left hand grabbed her arm. She inhaled sharply.
"No Sam that's not true." I spoke faster, starting to panic slightly more. "Sam let her go and I will show you, Sam." I swallowed. "I love you." Before those words had come easy, now they were bitter in my mouth. I took a final step closer. I could feel his breathe on my neck, like he was whispering a secret. My stomach clenched, the smell of booze filling my nostrils. "Let her go." I whispered before planting a soft kiss on his lips. I heard the knife drop to the floor, his hands reached around my waist. Chloe knelt down beside Ben.
"Lauren, he's in a bad way." She pulled out her phone.
"No don't call anyone!" Sam lunged for her but I held him back.
"Let her! If Ben dies, they'll come looking for you, then we will never be together." He wrapped his body around me again.
"OK."
"What did you give him Sam?"
"I..."
"You need to tell us, or the police will ask, they will get you in trouble."
"You only care about Benn!"
"No! No that's not true!" I kissed him again, he held me there, my lips pressed against his. "I love you Sam, that's why you need to tell me, I can cover for you." He listed the concoction of drugs that were milling round Ben's system.
"Shit. He needs help, and like, now!" I could hear the sirens in the distance. My savour. But it was still distant, still too far.
"We need to go."
"Sam, no, I can't leave."
"Lauren, you said you loved me. We need to go."
"I can't leave Chloe." I panicked. I needed a reason to stay. "I can't cover for you if I'm not here."
"you won't need to if I'm not here."
"Your finger prints are on the knife." My words came out jumbled and shaky. He reached towards the floor where it lay. I held my breath waiting for the weapon to be in his hand, once again a threat. A strong hand grabbed him from behind stopping him in his tracks.
"Sam, we are arresting you on suspicion of drugging a man, with the intent to harm other people. You do not have to say anything, anything you do say, when question can be used as evidence in court." The cuffs clicked round his wrists.
The world was a blur. I could hear Chloe behind me giving a full hand over to the paramedics.
"Lauren I love you." I watched them drag him to the police car. "Please forgive me Lauren." I walked up to him. The police watched me.
"I could have forgiven you for everything you did before. I could have lived with you cheating." His eyes glimmered in the foggy street light. "But I will never, ever, forgive you for holding a knife to my best friend's neck."